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Saturday, October 16, 2004

a sucker for the G string

come closer, little tiny readers, and allow mr. nice guy to let you all in on a little secret. sure, mr. nice guy is a devoted husband, bien sur he's a master chef, no doubt he will be a better father than anyone who has ever come before ... but there is one weakness to which he will admit.

let's put it this way: it occurs to mr. nice guy, in perusing this piece on graham greene, that the author of "the power and the glory" and the auteur of this particular blog are remarkably--dare i say undeniably--akin. both men were excommunicated by the pope himself. and both men--aside from their commanding presence, insatiable wanderlust, rakish charm and astonishing ability to finesse a deft turn of phrase--are known as connoisseurs of the female of the species.

there is indeed another woman. in fact, as mr. nice guy types these very words his first true, undying and everlasting love sits in his lap. mr. nice guy met her in sunny los angeles eight years ago and she has not once left his side in the intervening years. in fact, he is stroking her now as he admires his own shimmering prose, burned forever into the permanent medium of blogger. he is not ashamed of the love that dare not speak its name ... the love of a married man and his flaxen concubine.

homewrecker! Posted by Hello

her name is ella mae and she sounds just like honey poured all over a goose down pillow ... which sounds surprisingly good.

please forgive mr. nice guy: his parents are still in town, he is not at all stressed out and he is definitely not drunk. all will return to normal as soon as he gropes his way to the bathtub where he shall slip into sweet oblivion and never bother you again with his bloviating


Anonymous Anonymous said...

i was kinda hoping it was going to be a cat.

10/20/2004 8:25 PM  
Blogger mr. nice guy said...

oh, we have two (deformed) cats. neither of whom does mr. nice guy feel any special feelings for. he strokes them, yes. he fondles them vigorously. he's even into scooping their poopings. but there is nothing illicit. there is not passion there. there isn't even any there there.

10/20/2004 8:36 PM  

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