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Tuesday, December 12, 2006

"when we were babies, our parents made a conscious decision to deceive us."

lovers. i have tried and tried and tried. and i have FAILED. i wanted nothing more than to provide you with a mr nice guy exclusive: a streaming audio christmas playlist extravaganza for you all to enjoy while you carve your ceremonial geese, or do whatever it is you people do this time of year.

i am bitter. for two days i assembled the perfect yuletide mix, only to be denied posting it by the grinches of and odeo. i have one more trick up my sleeve, but i am skeptical that it will work. and also, i am feeling scroogish, less inclined to indulge in the holiday cheer. this is normal for me. you see, i actually hate christmas. (sorry to any wives or other family people this may disappoint, but if it helps, let me put it another way: i like buying you presents when nobody else is buying you presents, not when EVERYBODY else is. similarly, i like dressing up as a slutty catholic school girl on every day except halloween -- i mean, what's the fun in doing it when it's expected of you?)

oy, this city is crammed with fat tourists and tetchy shoppers and non-native pine needles. it's unbearable. i hate carols. i hate lights and trees and mandated good cheer. i hate creches and eggnog. bah, i tell you, humbug!

but what can you do? christmas keeps coming. i would be sad if it went away entirely. i mean, i like snow. and my family. and vacation. but, in the end i find a special resonance in this particular charlie brown remix. not for the agressively sentimental, but i think it's pretty damn funny:


Blogger jcz said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

12/13/2006 2:57 PM  
Anonymous Jane said...


12/13/2006 3:02 PM  
Blogger mr. nice guy said...

as it happens, janer, back door santa is indeed on the playlist. now stop ruining surprises for people, i might have a solution late tonight. as if anyone besides me cares about this

12/13/2006 3:47 PM  
Anonymous mel said...

ouch. I didn't even make it to the end of the clip. I much prefer the original Linus speech, MNG. I hope you were just looking for a reaction from your readers--among which now, apparently, I must classify myself as one of the Christmas-loving wives you addressed. sigh.

12/13/2006 9:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

bah humbug...indeed.

12/14/2006 12:11 AM  
Anonymous andrea said...

I care. Bring on the music.

12/14/2006 8:55 AM  
Blogger The other me said...

I only watched hlaf of the clip because I am a christmas loving wife married to a bah-humbug- what-already?-how-much more-don't-mention-it-and why? christmas husband, darn you all!!

12/14/2006 1:56 PM  
Blogger mr. nice guy said...

oh, other me, then you missed the part where they decide charlie brown must die and burn him at the stake. for serious!

12/14/2006 4:39 PM  
Anonymous Sisco said...

Here's the thing, mng, I'm at a crossroads. Can you tell me just what I'm supposed to say to my daughter next week at the company holiday party when the big white guy in the fake beard and red suit asks her to sit on his lap? I mean, for real? When she notices the other kids going over there and begins to point and say "what's that," should I say, "Oh, I don't think so," or should I say, "I don't know what that is, go ask your father"? Who, in this case, is the christmas-loving wife. Please help.

12/14/2006 6:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, I thought it was pretty damn sweet. Leaving now. Bye.

12/14/2006 9:24 PM  

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