an actual press release that somebody sent me today. please make the pain go away.

***PHOTO/INTERVIEW OPPORTUNITY***

CELEBRITY DOGS WALK RED CARPET AT LAUNCH OF NEW HEALTH/WELLNESS PRODUCT FOR PETS
Sex & the City Star Canine “Elizabeth Taylor” Will Celebrate HealthyMOUTH, First of its Kind Dental Care Water for Dogs and Cats, As It Makes Its Highly Anticipated NYC Debut on Thursday May 8th with an Evening of Pet Pampering

WHO:
Celebrity Doggie Divas will strut their stuff for the PAW-parrazi :
· Penny, King Charles Spaniel (“Elizabeth Taylor,” upcoming role in Sex and the City movie, also plays Charlotte’s dog on HBO series)
· Bravo, Golden Retriever (stars alongside Mark Wahlberg, Susan Sarandon and Rachel Weisz in the upcoming Lovely Bones)
· Mia, Miniature Pinscher (stars alongside Paul Giamatti and Billy Crudup in the upcoming Pretty Bird)
· Camille, Jack Russell, seen in ads for fashion house COACH
· Bijou, Chihuahua, seen in print spoof of Paris Hilton’s dog in Maxim Magazine
· And 40 other cute, well-behaved, party-hopping dogs!



it goes on. but i lost the will to live right around here.