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Thursday, November 04, 2004

the most important question of our time

mr. nice guy is a little heartbroken today, and probably not for whatever twisted reason you might have reached for. he has put the election behind him and will go on probing the important facts of life, just as he would have if gordon fucking shumway were elected president. (mrs nice guy, however, has disappeared. will she ever return?)

no. the reason for my heartbreak is thus: i had grand plans for this particular post. it was to be mr nice guy's great reach-across-the-aisle gesture. he was going to unite this troubled land through music. he had planned to post two beautiful, quasi-rare songs (instead, you'll have to settle for 30-second clips): one for the republicans, one for the democrats, and through the INELUCTABLE HEALING CHURN OF THE FUNK, unite them all.

alas. i am a luddite and i cannot figure out how to post mp3s (or 4s or 32s) on this consarned site. but. in the end, that's your loss. not mine. the deepest grooves, as you may know, cut past the ears and straight to the bone, no matter who you think you are. it's just too bad that your ears, gentle monkeys, will not be made love to in the way only mr nice guy would have done it here today ...

instead. in the spirit of this week, i wish to ponder the most deeply divisive question of our times (after this one: it is my tiny humble opinion that "tastes great" is for the red staters, whereas "less filling" is more of a blue state meme). but. the question i wish to spend the rest of the evening answering, you cannot help me on. by going unanswered, it risks tearing the very stitches from the fabric of our civil life. in coming to a happy conclusion here, i believe we can all look to the future with hope and optimism. the question? it is thus, and only through hours of nice guy research will a workable detante be attained:

scotch? or irish whiskey?


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for giving me a word I didn''t know, or rather as I learned, an idiom. (consarned) Good Luck with your little one, I have 2 and they very quickly sprout horns and breathe fire.


11/05/2004 12:49 PM  

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